Fast-food salads Pt.1

Okay so lately ive been telling myself that eating a salad for lunch is a healthy and responsable thing to do. So I've been driving through various fast-food chain resturaunts in the search of the best fast-food-salad. I'd like to riff on a few of my experiences.

This here is the Jack In The Box Southwest Chicken Salad. It comes packed with some funky ass rubbar grilled chicken, "southwestern bacon ranch" dressing that can be described as kind of a sweet and spicy mayonaise. Complementing the dressing and as a awesome bonus its comes with black beans, cherry tomatoes, shredded cheddar cheese, red onion slices, cucumbers, bacon bits and a packet of these wierd crunky "southwestern" style croutons that are also spicy in nature. I have to say so far this is the best fast food salad i've come accross, this really isn't saying much, but its a respectfull attempt at creating a stylized salad that appeals to the clint eastwood in all of us. Then agian it's really just a handfull of crapy D grade veggies that are probebley just as bad for you as anything else of the menu.

I am a avid user of the salad shake method which if preformed correctly can throughly and evenly distribute the dressing and other cute contents throughout out your salad. The methond goes like this, throw all that shit that comes packaged with the salad, close the top and shake the shit out of it. (Note: if your gonna do this please seek privacey people might think your just going postal on your lunch) this ussually works pretty good and if i might say so, it's the best way to enjoy one these pieces of shit. I mean one of the worst things i could ever imagine eating or watching someone else eat would be to just rip that packet of dressing open, pour it on top, and dig in. You'd have to be crazy! like five to six bites of dressing soaked iceberg lettuce folowed by a tour through the driest, most vomit enducing, garden freshness experiance possible in the salad world. And by the way if you get a regular coke with your salad, your fucking reetarded, you might as well give yourself a laxative cuz this coke-salad combo can only lead to painfull minutes on the toliet followed by some akward moments looking into the bowl and trying to figure out if you should call your doctor. tTommarow, Carl's Jr. Charbroiled Chicken salad!