lecture # whatever

So it's Monday and that means my co-worker Ralph gives me his obligatory, "you should take this time to do something with yourself". It's half pep-talk half this is what i did and look at me, don't end up like me thing... it's really weird. I mean the guy is in his early 50's and he's just trying to get on my level i guess and try to get me to go to school and become a attorney, politician, film maker, who knows? I still feel like I'm young enough to do whatever i want i just don't want someone to pay for an education or school that I'm not really into anyways, plus i think that I'd feel like i owed someone something and make a even bigger deal out of doing nothing, mediocrity right now would be a blessing, i feel like one big loose end like the office at the end of Charlie's chocolate factory, where there is have a hall tree, half a clock, half a desk with a half typewriter on it. Like all the things around me are unfinished and that my head is like a traffic jam of ideas, thing i want to do, things i need to do, things i have to do for myself, things i need to do for others, and various other obligations and meaningless bullshit i call everyday life, i mean how fun can your weekend be when i thought that today was like Thursday instead of Monday that means the weekend was shitty i think...

i dreamt that i confronted my mothers former hostile boyfriend and he turned into my dad

i dreamt that i was driving a polished white Rolls Royce, circa 1982

are my hands as dirty as the water that runs off of them?